Croisade
Thank you for these comments. 😁
Cynthia Marie Moulthrop
And the rubber tipped pointers! One day in 4th grade, Sister Agatha hit Matthew C so hard on the back while he was at the chalkboard ( yes, back when you could use chalk in school)with the pointer that the rubber tip flew out the window (yes, back in the days when you could open windows in a school) . That was 50 years ago and I still remember it!
Ultraviolet
Thank you for this. In my entire Catholic education, I never once saw a pointer that had a rubber tip. It was always just a turned-down piece of wood with a small "shoulder" to support a rubber tip. Now I know why.
Ultraviolet
All that's missing are the rulers they carried when teaching class. They were terrifyingly accurate with them, too. Sister Audette, my first-grade French teacher once killed a fly in mid air with one swing.
Croisade
Wow. You know these sisters?
Ultraviolet
I don't know these sisters, but I was educated by ones who wore the traditional habit like them. Sweet, devout women -until- someone or something riled them. As so many of us who've languished in Catholic schools on a gorgeous day a few weeks before the end of the year can remember, a buzzing fly is an instant fascination. Since Sister couldn't smack everyone for being distracted, she went …More
I don't know these sisters, but I was educated by ones who wore the traditional habit like them. Sweet, devout women -until- someone or something riled them. As so many of us who've languished in Catholic schools on a gorgeous day a few weeks before the end of the year can remember, a buzzing fly is an instant fascination. Since Sister couldn't smack everyone for being distracted, she went after the source of the problem.

I once asked an accredited Japanese Kendo instructor if he could hit a fly in mid-air with his shinai. He laughed. "I've tried. It's impossible." Maybe for Kendo instructors, but not for habit-wearing nuns. An angry "old-school" nun could channel the literal Wrath of God.

One day Sister Audette caught a boy named Scott chewing gum after she already told him not to. She told him there wouldn't be a second warning, so what happened next was his own fault. A few days later little Scotty slipped in a second piece of gum. Sister was teaching and then, suddenly she simply moved, swung her ruler at full length and caught Scott across the side of the mouth. Not hard enough to break anything or draw blood, but hard enough to leave one heck of a mark AND snap his head to the side, sending his gum flying across the room, rolling all over those icky dusty floors.

Sister wasn't done. She walked over, picked up the gum, went back to Scott who was bawling, and placed the gum on his desk. "You dropped your gum, Scott." He looked up at Sister's placid beautific face with an awful, slow comprehension. "If you like chewing so much, please continue. I insist." Sister punctuated that last word with a jab from her ruler. She made Scott chew that filthy piece of gum for the rest of the class, much to the amusement and glee of the rest of the class.

I personally learned that nuns have mysterious psychic powers like the Jedi knights in Star Wars. Scott's problem was the movement of his jaw. Sister spotted that. Clever Ultraviolet was much more clever. One afternoon I slipped a Werther's butterscotch candy in my mouth while Sister's back was turned and she was writing on the board.. Mind you, I'd already unwrapped it before class so Sister wouldn't catch that distinctive crinkling sound of the candy wrapper.

Basking in the sublime goodness of a Werther's confection. I was feeling very pleased with myself. Sister might have caught Scott but not someone like me. Unexpectedly Sister stopped her discussion of verbs and stared upward. Then dropped her gaze directly at me, like a marksman bringing a rifle on target. "Ultraviolet... swallow it. Now." *guuulp* "Yes, Sister." "Don't do that again." "No, Sister."

For over forty years now, I have tried to figure out how Sister knew I had a candy in my mouth. She didn't see the candy go in my mouth, no chewing, Werther's candies are flat so there isn't any give-away cheek-bulge, I sat in the back row (yeah, I was one of those kids), but... she knew. Somehow she knew. True story.
Kevin
@Ultraviolet I went to a non-Catholic school (converted to Catholicism when I was 24) but I'd rather have had your strict sisters than the creeps we had who were always trying to push Marxism down our throats, instead of getting sweets out of them!
salliperson
@Ultraviolet wa wa wa get over it.
Ultraviolet
You're assuming I'm complaining about it, @salliperson . I'm not. It always amuses me how often spiteful little whiners like you reply to my comments after you've blocked me from commenting on your own. Go be a butthurt hypocrite somewhere else.
Ultraviolet
@Kevin Those came later in college. The ones who didn't wear habits, just the veil. They were the social justice nuns. Even back then they had an unhealthy (though chaste) infatuation with left-wing Jesuit scholar-priests. Those classes were E-Z. Sister would parrot Fr. Derpy SJ's garbage, everyone would take notes on the key points, and then parrot it back to her on the exams. Essentially …More
@Kevin Those came later in college. The ones who didn't wear habits, just the veil. They were the social justice nuns. Even back then they had an unhealthy (though chaste) infatuation with left-wing Jesuit scholar-priests. Those classes were E-Z. Sister would parrot Fr. Derpy SJ's garbage, everyone would take notes on the key points, and then parrot it back to her on the exams. Essentially like all leftists, what they really wanted was an echo-box. If they got it, those nuns handed out A's easier than cows drop manure. A fitting analogy since that's what they were dropping in the first place.

Great classes, I'd usually finish my homework for my real classes while they were "teaching" and none of them ever caught me going through a pack of gummi-bears, M&M's or Twizzlers while I was doing it. No joke... they were so infatuated with their teaching material even Twizzlers escaped their notice.